Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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