Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
