We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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