no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
