so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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