Can i not drive my cunt home
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
