no. you can't hotbox the world.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
