you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
