a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize