The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
