Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
