yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
