Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Randomize
