Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize