her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
