How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
where are you?
Hypothermia
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
