We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
