If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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