I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
