sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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