we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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