i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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