I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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