im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
