Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
