thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
