Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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