at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize