he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
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