I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize