My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
