But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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