P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
