check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
