this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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