I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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