Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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