he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Randomize
