Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
