She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize
