Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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