So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
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