It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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