It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I love you. Go after that dick
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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