You made me cry and you don't even care
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize