Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
She has the best kind of daddy issues
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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