Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
