All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
My friends, they love my intelligence
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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