I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
