How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
