we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize