I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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